Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Message from the Great Beyond

...Seeing as how I'm 'dead' now, and all.

I've gone over this (what I would post about this situation) 20,000 times in my head, pondering all of the things I've wanted to point out for a long time.  But it almost seems that it wouldn't matter either way.  No matter what is said, people will (rightfully) form their own opinions.  Many people already HAVE and will NOT be swayed.

If you can come away with reading that and feel that I have said anyone is BAD or evil or terrible in any way for posting that IP address, then so be it.  I stated that I felt it wasn't necessary to post the info, regardless of whether or not any actual harm could come about.  Most of discussion was calm and rational.  Everyone involved presented their OWN opinions and thoughts and concerns about the situation.  People who disagreed said "I respectfully disagree".  Isn't that what discussion is supposed to be about?

On the Fury matter -- of COURSE I don't think it would be okay for Fury to do one thing and TMN or someone else to do the same exact thing and be blasted for it...but who in the hell was BLASTING them?  For the record - and not that it even matters at this point - but for the record, I was dumbfounded by the SITUATION she described.  I've commented on one of her previous posts about that.  To be very frank and very honest, I DID notice that she posted those IP addresses (without the other personally-identifying info such as ISP and location).  I have no reason to lie about that, but I apologize for not being more clear about it.

At that point, the whole business of the IP address seemed to be winding down.  People spoke their pieces and had pretty much just agreed to disagree on the whole matter.  So what I'm gleaning from this is that it would have been better if I had said "Wow, I don't know whether to laugh or guffaw....but Fury, you were damn, damn wrong for posting those IP addresses and you know it.  Haven't we been THROUGH this already dammit?!  Why stoop to that level?  Why be so heartless and callous?!"


People had agreed to disagree on the matter, so saying that would have accomplished...what exactly?  Most people were barely even thinking about or discussing it anymore.  Even if I still questioned the act of posting IPs in my pea-brain head, what in the name of glory would it have accomplished to have brought it up, or in the words of TMN, "finger-wagged"?  Would that not have been considered shit-starting, especially considering that most people had already begun writing off the issue as another issue that had been visited, revisited, and laid to rest, not bringing it up again in a sarcastic way, days after the initial discussion?

If AE or Vin or Zeri or Evie or RD or Random or anyone else had posted what Fury did, dealing with and laying out that whole crazy situation with the Biff chick, I would have written the exact. same. thing.  It was a ridiculous situation, and I literally didn't know whether to drop my jaw or laugh.  Who ever said it was okay for HER to do something and no one else?  Who in this entire blogosphere has ever actually SAID that?  I can't for the life of me understand why it is considered BLASTING and pot-shooting to have an opinion different than that of someone else. TMN has made the act of picking apart comments & posts and vehemently disagreeing with them a virtual SCIENCE.  Bloggers come along and state their honest opinions about a situation that they question and they are thrown under the bus?  And immediately following their posts with statements along the lines of "and we don't want to hear THIS" or "don't even try to say THAT" or "before you even think of saying yada yada, don't even bother"....statements like that serve to try and discredit anything you say in defense or explanation BEFORE you even have a chance to utter one single word, so anything you say after that comes across like an excuse.

"...ones we'd have thought were the best weren't necessarily shared by you out there."

Why is it such a stretch to believe that the same can be said for differences of opinion in thoughts and ideas, that their opinions might not be shared by everyone?  Some people cheerfully applauded the act of posting the IP addresses, and some felt, in their own opinions, that it was either unnecessary, disturbing, or going a bit far.  If you truly and honestly in the bottom of your heart felt that posting the IP addresses was not a good idea, for WHATEVER reason, should you not be free to speak openly and say so?  And if you DID think it was justified or just a doggone good idea, shouldn't you be able to say so without fear of attack or being labeled a 'dick-rider'?

There's so much more I wish I could say, but in the end I'm not sure it would serve much purpose or be very necessary.  If I'm 'dead' to TMN, well, okay.  Those are some of the harshest words that you can say to a person, period, and I can't imagine anyone who would WANT to hear that, even coming from a complete stranger who walked up to you on the street out of nowhere.  I don't know these people -- I've never broken bread with them, never had long online chats with them.  I don't know these people's hopes or dreams or fears or passions or beliefs.  Never shared an intimate moment, never had a hearty laugh in a chatbox, never confided with them openly about my own life or theirs.  So I don't really know how I'm supposed to react to I supposed to feel that my simming and blogging life is all but over with?  That my few piddly accomplishments in life are all for naught?  That I should descend into some black hole of despair and regret and shame....? If I'm not supposed to care what they or anyone else thinks, then ok.  If I AM supposed to care and be absolutely and utterly WRECKED by this new revelation, then ok.  I think the people that know me know which way I'll lean on that one.

I stand by my comment that I wrote on Kelle's blog.  I have little issue with what I wrote on Fury's blog, though in hindsight I see I should have made it clear exactly what I was commenting about, and again, I apologize for that.  I STILL don't believe it would have served any positive purpose to have mentioned the IP address situation in that comment when everything was dying down about it.  I just don't see it.  And as I said, it would NOT have mattered if those comments were on someone else's blog.  If you don't believe a word of what I'm saying, then I can't change that.  I regret it, because I'm telling the truth, but I can't put a gun to someone's head and FORCE them to believe me.  Why would anyone want to do that anyway?  It can be frustrating, but it isn't worth all of that.

My hope is that people will feel free to raise questions when they see fit, regardless of who exactly it is they are questioning.  This statement, in black and white, is from TMN's own "mouth", so to speak:

"Like we've said before, accept nothing and question everything in the Simmer's world - including us."

If you can take them up on their word about everything else, then do NOT feel wary of taking them up on that statement.  If it is supposedly acceptable to question them and to feel free to disagree, then it should raise even MORE questions when people are made to feel ashamed for doing so by the very same people who declared we should in the first place.

And I guess that's that.  I have spent 10 awesome years as a part of this community, and I'm not going anywhere.  If you want to believe that I'm some different person from what you know me to be, then I regret that.  If you would like for me to remove your links from my blog, I regret that also, but I will respect it and do so.

I have met wonderful people in this community over all these years, people who I admire and greatly respect, and who I sometimes have differences of opinions with.  Those differing opinions have NOT gotten in the way of my friendships or acquaintanceships with these people, and in many cases I have come to learn more about them THROUGH those opinions.  It makes for much more well-rounded relationships.

I do not expect everyone to always agree with what I say.  If you have a differing opinion on something I've said, PLEASE say so.  All I ask is that you do it honestly and respectfully, as you would want someone to do with you.  No one gets it right 100% of the time, and no one gets it wrong 100% of the time -- that goes for governments, your parents, friends, religious leaders -- even Jarsie, believe it or not.  o_O

I guess that's all I have to say about it.  Gonna have to give the 'ghost' thing a whirl now, see where it takes me, lol. 



  1. regardelss of what the mare, or anyone else says, im not gonna stop reading your blog or suddenly think differently about you. im not a mindless sheep. so, you keep on going and doing what you do girl, and there are those of us who will still be here. This is your blog, and your place to say what YOU wanna say. no one can take that away from you.


  2. I will agree with Zeri here. You are free to your right to speak as much as the next person. I do see that your post could also be seen in more than one way, so there was definitely a possibility of miscommunication, or things being taken out of context, and that happens. All you can do is speak your piece and try to move on from it the best you can.

    I still follow you and I won't stop following you either. We may be on separate sides of the fence when it comes to these issues, but it won't stop me from reading your intelligent and articulate posts.

  3. Forgot to add that however, if you wish me to stop following and/or remove your links from my own, then feel free to let me know and it will be done.

  4. The Mares have attacked you too? So that makes you, Kelle, Blaz, and who knows how many others all over two girls who were fighting? (By the way, I happen to agree with you; posting IP adresses was taking it too far.) I still don't get how it was the Mares business in the first place exactly. *shugs* But their 'holier than thou' attitude's starting to tick me off. >_>

    I'm glad that you didn't let them scare ya off! You have a right to your opinion.

  5. Everyone does indeed have a right to their opinion. I try really hard to stay out of the drama and generally keep my opinions to myself so I don't have these problems.

    I just wanted to let you know that I won't stop following your blog over this. It's not so serious an issue as that. :)

  6. Girl what is really going on? I honestly don't understand why people think it's okay to post IPs. IPs should only be dealt with a higher power/authority. I say if you know who the IP belongs to, just call that person out instead..dont post something so dire where it could end up in someone getting hurt. No one knows for sure how sane people are these days, not to mention how many eyes view blogs!! What if something was to happen to that person, you could be held responsible to some degree....

    In the end will posting IPs now become a trend within the community to catch 'trolls' or to get back at someone? We all need to either grow up or leave situations as is and keep it moving.

    Cele, you dont have to worry about me removing you from my list or not following, you're my friend and so far you haven't let me down, nor do I expect you to...keep preaching


  7. You said it woman!

    How's the ghost life going by the way, i find it quite nice i catch a cool breeze much easier now and its much needed in the heat of this fire. LoL! I wubs you.

  8. you cant really do anything with an IP address. it basicaly just says what youre computers name is.
    so i dont understand why ppl keep making this an issue

  9. Hmm well if that's all it is, I still think it crosses some kind of boundary...

  10. Wow, this is horrible. Now, before I say anything, i want to clarify that I am not really sure what is going on here. Poida ( God bless him) tried to explain it all to me, but I admit I don't always follow all the drama, cause I don't wanna corrupt my happy place with it.

    That said, this is horrible. I am really feeling horrible for everyone involved in this the last couple of days.

    I feel bad for the Mares, cause it seems to me that they are feeling picked on and misunderstood.

    I feel sorry for you Cel cause you feel picked on and misunderstood.

    I don't feel sorry for the trolls however.

    Now, I admit, my understanding is often small and my brain power weak. So if I get this wrong, please feel free to correct me.

    The Mares mentioned gamers using IP addresses to ban gamers within the gaming community for many years. This is correct. My sweetie and I met playing Never Winter Nights online and soon we ended up behind scenes as the people who helped out being in charge of the server and making up story lines for quests. This did involve, sadly the banning of IP addresses and CD keys.

    All your IP address is ( from my small understanding) the place from which your computer talks to the internet. Now, IP addresses can be changed and many people have them changed each time their computer comes on. It's not a big deal. It doesn't give out your life's history, or your tax file number or for you American's out there, your Social Security Number. From MY understanding, it's pretty harmless.

    No where, in my opinion have the Mares over stepped any bounds in posting an IP address. It would in MY opinion be over stepping MY personal bounds if they posted my name and street address for every one to see ( though I often use my own name, so that would not phase me either) which from my knowledge they have not done. in fact they have been quite careful in hiding personal info when they come across it.

    Nor, in my belief do I think it is wrong for Simmers to disagree with the Mares on any stance they take. We each have our own thoughts and values ..that's what make us, us.

    That said, the Mares are actually people too. Yes, I think they are ( heehe) which means that they have all the emotions we do. So, if they feel like they are being fired at or put under the gun, they will of course react in a human way, which may or may not include hurt feelings.

    I am not saying this is what you did Cel, but if I felt like people were having a go at me for the same thing that oh say, Poida is doing, but not having a go at him for it, my feelings would be hurt too. And I would wonder why something is okay for him to do and not okay for me to do.

    That scenario is how *I* see what's happened here. I think mostly this is a misunderstanding, because we can not read "tone" in the words written on the net, and often I think hurt feelings happen just because of lack of inflection in the written word..if that makes sense.

    At the end of the day, all I can really say is I am sorry that anyone's feelings have been hurt. I think as a whole we have a great Simming community and we need to stick together and build each other up.

  11. And OMG I LOVE that song! Have you played Borderlands, by any chance?! Hehehe. If you have, then you too would know that's used for the opening song...God, what a nerd I am!

  12. I haven't really followed what has been going on with this IP stuff, but let me tell you this:

    I think everyone is entiteled to voice his or her opinion about any subject (as long as it doesn't intentionally hurt one or a group of people); this is a fundamental right in the free world !!
    Some people may not like an (your)opinion, but I think that's OK, because I think everyone is unique, so opinions tend to differ.
    Attacking people about an opinion is fundamentally wrong and violates the rights of an individual.
    I also don't care what other people say about a specific person, I do form my own opinion about that person (regardless of what other people say)

    So for me Cel, nothing has changed. I still read your stories whenever I come accross them and enjoy them; and of course I'll follow your blog !

    Hugz <3

  13. Aw cel :( I'm on my way to work right now, but i couldn't just say nothing after reading that! I promise a long email to bore you with, when I get back <3 keep your head high, Chick, and know that nobody in their right mind could ever hate you Xxx

  14. Sorry I couldn't respond earlier...I tried but firefox really went wonky on me!! Had to do some serious internet searching thank goodness I found out what it is.

    As for you speaking from the great beyond..

    I'd like to express my deepest and most sincere condolences and sympathies to you and your family. I am glad that you are still able to communicate with us!! :) I guess with every negative there is a positive.

    With your being dead....I guess they won't bother you anymore...unless they use one of those board thingy's that speak to the deceased!! Can't think of the name of it....

    *shivers* I hate those things!